It's been a while since I've expressed an opinion. I've sort of lost my words and my personality and my sense of humor these days, but I'll give it a shot.
There's been some recent heated discussion over on The Rumor regarding bloggers who sometimes say not-so-flattering things about creators' works.
I have mixed feelings about this topic and there's no point in me rehashing things that have already been said. (You can read my two cents over there in Comments if you have absolutely nothing better to do with your life.) I often read The Rumor. I laugh at some of the commentary and I wince at some of it and I take it for what it is — one person's opinion, not the Holy Second Life Bible of Sh*t You Need to Buy. Ultimately I appreciate the work over there — the previews of sale and hunt items are a godsend in these days of crashing with every third TP.
I can certainly understand feelings of hurt and anger if any blogger flat-out says something insulting like, "MY GOD THIS IS UGLY PASS ME THE EYE BLEACH THIS CREATOR SUCKS WANG." My problem is when creators get rabid over a balanced review that just happens to include some negative feedback, or even something that's not necessarily inflammatory, like "This outfit isn't for me" or "I'm not a fan of this look because [insert reason]." Hell, once I wrote a post where I happened to lament, "Damn, [this store] is having a sale today and I just dropped a thousand lindens there last week," and the owner basically started a Plurk war over it and transformed me into an ungrateful commoner who didn't appreciate sales. It was fun.
Anyway, the debate is kind of old news by now, but I started thinking about the flip side of it this week when I started seeing allllll the posts all over the feeds about tomorrow's Vintage Fair.
Unfortunately, I'm not one of those people who usually comes to mind when someone's having an event and making a list of bloggers to put on the early access/review copy/etc. list. There's no bitterness in that statement. I don't do a lot of self-promotion and my blogging frequency has really dropped off and my photos sometimes leave something to be desired and I'm not your typical fashion blogger (although I do always try to credit everything in my posts and, better yet, include prices when I can so readers don't show up at a store and keel over from sticker shock). And I write really long rambling sentences like that one right there.
If I happen to catch the buzz on an event that sounds like something I'd like to blog and I can find a blogger application for it, I'll sometimes apply. And speaking of the Vintage Fair, in the past I've occasionally requested to be on the bloggers lists for Chic Management events and have been accepted, so even if this post was meant to be a beef-slinger, it wouldn't be pointed in that direction.
But in light of the discussion over at The Rumor and the frequency of "Hey everybody! I'm a [insert event name here!] Blogger" posts, the thing that amuses me a little is this:
There have been times when I've admired a creator or heard of an upcoming event that sounded kind of cool and have put in a request to be a blogger in that capacity. And there have been times when the creator or event manager has responded, "Sorry. I'm not a fan of your blog" or the very popular "Sorry, we don't think your blog is a good fit for us" or even "I really don't care if my work is featured in your blog," or even a slightly tamer version of "Please take your ellipses and your ALL CAPS and shove them up your ass."
My response to that kind of feedback is usually an internal "ouch" (actually, make it an all-caps internal "OUCH") and maybe even, depending on the time of the month, a couple of tears, and then I get on with my SLife and try to accept the fact that this blog isn't for everyone. I don't write ranting posts or broadcast the creator's name. Hell, I usually don't even boycott the event or creator. It hurts, but when you put yourself out there publicly, you have to accept the fact that not everyone's going to be a fan, and sometimes they're going to bluntly say so. I will admit that at this point I'm starkly terrified to ask someone if I can blog their stuff/event, but that's about the only lasting consequence of the "I don't like your blog" dialogue.
So I guess that's the one thing I'd like to say to creators who get publicly outraged and start a flame war against bloggers who are outspoken enough to express a negative opinion. It goes both ways. Some of us get it from your side too. It just comes with the territory of creative self-expression, I guess.
. . . Hey, look at my mouse sleigh up there!
The Sleigh Hunt (runs through 11/30) is a small hunt sponsored by Carriage Trade and featuring equestrian-themed prizes. I saw this prize from United InshCon on another blog and had to have it. I'll take mouse droppings on my roof over reindeer patties any day. The link to the Web site, including participants, SLURLs and some pictures of the prizes, is below.
HERE'S MY LIST OF LINKS, YO
The Rumor
Chic Management
The Sleigh Hunt
36 comments:
I was over on my gazebo earlier tonight getting ready to take pics and as I was camming around to get an angle, suddenly I wondered "Is that a sleigh in the sky?" LOL!
Oh, and I'll admit it. I read The Rumor. Sometimes I TOTALLY agree with their statements. Sometimes I don't. Sometimes I just laugh because it's so crazy. But they put all the sales & hunts & other crap out there so that I don't have to go hunt it down myself, and in a format that's easy for me to glance at, so I'm glad they're around for that.
Well, okay. And for the times I feel snarky and like to read bitching. That's cool too.
BAHAHA! Ali, I actually thought of you when I put that sleigh up there. I thought, "Ali is either going to laugh or kick my ass for trailer-parking up my yard (as usual)."
LOL - if it ever messes with your photo angles, you can move it around or throw it on the ground or whatever. I think you still have edit rights to my stuff. It won't be there long - the thing is 90 prims or something like that.
Ok, let's see if I can leave a comment today without messing up! I always seem to screw up something when I comment on your blog, sorrrrrrrrrrry!
That's terrible that a designer would say that to you :( You're one of the blogs I enjoy *READING* -- and yes, your pictures are a jagged mess, but you know that <3
Thanks, Gogo. :)
P.S. You did it right this time! LOL :D
I can see my house from there! (lmao)
I admit that I don't really care for The Rumor, not because they say mean things, lord knows I can be a mean girl when I want but it seems to me like they try too hard for that image, saying stuff just for the hell of it. however I think if a creator reads inflamatory statements about their creations, their best course is to ignore it and take whichever part of the high road they can find, they'll come out looking the classier of the two, for sure.
Aisu, I PURPOSEFULLY moved the sleigh around so I could get your house in the shot! Everything about your yard over there is so tranquil. ♥
MWHAHAHAH I NOW OWN A SLEIGH PULLED BY RATS!! MWHAHAHAHAH
I would have never known about that if not for you. Thank you
*typo in my first comment..what typo? I see no comment with a typo in it..*shifty eyes*
I have to admit, I've critiqued things sometimes and get nervous about responses. Once I got an unequivocally positive response; I referenced not being able to edit a collar and said I didn't have a "graceful, swanlike neck" and the creator laughed, IMed me about laughing, gave me a resized collar that would fit my neck, and some more stuff to wear. I thought a LOT more positively about that store afterward. The rest of the time I haven't gotten any responses, which makes me a little nervous, but no bannings either. That being said, I have a short list of stores I don't buy from, and one of them is the chick who banned you AND a bunch of your commentors because of things you said on your blog. I cleared her stuff out of my inventory, too.
I read your post with a lot of interest. I could not agree more with you. I have a small little blog and am certainly not on the "hot-SL-blog-list". I do believe however that a blogger should be able to express his/her opinion while being respectful to the designers. I blog mainly gifts and freebies so it would be totally unfair to hammer a designer because his/her gift sucks... A little diplomacy and respect should prevail, but on the other hand knocking a designer off of his/her power trip, like The Rumor does, helps putting things back into place... Unfortunately, some of the successful designers, or the ones who think they are, need an eye openener. Freedome of speech is very important and if a designer can't get criticism, then that designer has a problem!
@Softpaw, that made me laugh so hard! You ROCK THAT RAT SLEIGH!
@Deoridhe, AWWWW YES! The Lemania Indigo Prozac Hunt incident. Back then, I think I was just starting Prozac and it felt like my brain was vibrating all the time, which was bad enough as it was, and then she announced the Prozac Hunt and I got a little too bitchy about the faces she painted on the pills and the fact that she was HIDING MY MEDS ALL OVER HER SIM!
Now I am older, wiser, and a much more seasoned mood-altering-pill popper. Today I would probably be a little more mellow about a hunt like that, thanks to the pills and my evolved perspective on them. :)
And SPEAKING OF YOU AND ALL THIS, DEORIDHE - you were an eyewitness to the one time this year when I got a little touchy . . . about Natas Designs' gift on Sept. 11 this year. But then during the ensuing comment dialogue, the creator (Natasha Shoteka) proved herself to be classy and nice, so then I felt like the world's biggest ass and tried to backpedal out of the whole mess, and I think you chimed in and tried to help get me back on solid ground. I have to go back and check that post. But it was great teamwork and I have great affection for you now for standing by me during the humiliation. That's a real friend!
And it's also why I'm usually reluctant to criticize anything too harshly here - the subject of my criticism inevitably turns out to be someone I'd probably like to be friends with, and then I feel like a jerk and I guess I'm losing my edge because I'm not hardcore enough to make people cry and not give a damn about it anymore.
GOD, THIS COMMENT! CAN YOU TELL WHEN MY AMBIEN KICKED IN? Somewhere up there where it all melted into RAMBLE SOUP. The words are wiggling around! I'd better turn off the computer. Unless a wiggly hot guy quickly shows up - I'd stick around for that Ambien trip.
Hey Emerald, firstly I just want to say I LOVE that cute sleigh you have there! Secondly, I LOVE your blog, and those who say mean things about your blog clearly don't know what they're missing! Also, regarding all these events and being included (or excluded) from the who's who in the bloggosphere (did I spell that right? lol), I have long come to the conclusion that it's not how GOOD you are, but it's how well-connected you are--just look at some of the so-called 'quality' contents of the 'exclusive' blogger groups or events, you'll know what I mean--but don't get me wrong, I'm not looking down at these since we all have to start somewhere, but if they make their groups so exclusive and claim high standards, then they should really have something to show for it, don't you think? Anyways, I think I've said too much! Keep on writing and posting Emerald, I'm right behind you all the way! hugssssss
Bahia - I love your blog! You have a great taste level when it comes to blogging freebies and the whole thing has really good energy - maybe it's the design and the music. I love the translations too. ♥
LisaMun - I love you and you make me laugh. My first draft of this post was a little more, um, tense, and said something to that exact effect and then listed the creators and events that have given me a "no," including some of their choice quotes.
But then I decided I didn't want to start a huge thing over here. It would've been fun for two minutes and then it would have gotten ugly.
But regarding your comment, I'm thinking of one person in particular who distributed the blogger application through her store subscribo and later, after I returned it, told me my blog "really isn't a good fit for our event" - which amuses me, because it's a weekly sales event with cheap and sometimes quirky things (which is what I prefer to blog). However, as far as weekly sales events go, this one often doesn't have the same caliber of participants as some of the others. And now in retrospect, I look back and think, "actually thank God my blog is NOT a 'GOOD FIT' for this event." OOCH see, and that sounded like a slam, but truly, many of the items in this particular weekly sale aren't my preferred style. So it really wasn't a good fit. So maybe the chick who runs it was actually being REALLY INSIGHTFUL instead of snappish.
This comment makes me feel weary. I must stop trying to make sense tonight. :-\
Oh being invited to most events has A LOT to do with who you are connected with rather than how you blog or take pics. But once you have your foot in the door...well, it's up to you to keep it moving because one day the person who got you into the groups & stuff can leave or be blacklisted themselves. The SL fashion world is pretty flighty in the grand scheme of it all. And I've probably just been blacklisted from some groups because of the blog I confessed to reading/agreeing with sometimes. LOL But hey, that's how it goes.
The word verification for this comment is "bless." I'm blessed, yo!
mmmmmm, tastee ramble soup.
Yeah, I remember - 9/11 commemorative furniture still makes me cringe, but the store owner definitely showed class. One of the best/worst aspects of the internet, I think, is you can be brought up short against people who really disagree with you - and how you respond says a lot about you as a person (and not always good things).
You were totally not harsh on that, though. It was totally "This is how I feel about it." Her 'supporters' though became REALLY insulting really quickly.
I don't think making people cry and not caring makes someone edgy, though. It makes someone cruel - and you never struck me as cruel. I think some of the biggest "edgy" moves a person can make is to be really vulnerable, and to take the consequences of that vulnerability without becoming harsh and cold. Cruelty is expected - even rewarded - in the culture of the internet. Being vulnerable is often seen as making oneself a target, but I also think it indicates one is a stronger and more courageous person.
That's what I call huge marketing fail. You may not have the best pics in SL, but if I was a content creator, I'd die to have my stuff featured on your blog AND HAVE YOU SAY STUFF ABOUT IT IN CAPS. You know why? There are tons of blogs with nice or even great pics, but you're the one who ads soul to it. You're the one who's funny, who tells the story, who makes me want to go to a store to see something that I wouldn't normally wear. Or like.
On the other hand, people's taste are always a game of fate :D Last year when I applied for Hair Fair, I was new in blogging, I had no defined style and my pics sucked big time. And I didn't know anyone in SL (except my guy and my alts:D). And I got picked.
Now, one year later, I applied to some groups and I got ignored big time. Not even a 'your blog sucks reply. Plus, I see designers spread stuff to dozens of bloggers, and some of them have ugly shape and really bad pics, and I'm not on their list. Would I apply? No. If they did not notice me, I'm not good enough for them, I guess. Being on all designers' lists and in all events would be boring, I think.
It may also hurt sometimes (not that I'd ever admit that, for the record :D) but there are those people who like you. Because you are who you are and you do what you do. So please keep doing that. I'm not the kind who often comments on blog posts, but I get withdrawals if you don't update for a week.
Hey Emerald. I am the last person to comment on fashion anything since I have not changed my clothes in SL since Burn2 in October. I have been so beaten into submission by the haters that I can barely hit publish anymore so I really have no leg to stand on here. Having said all of that? I think you are refreshing, funny, smart and I love your blog. It stands out head and shoulders above the pablum dished up by 90% of the SLfashionistas. Do not let the haters get to you darlin. You are a star in my eyes.
Your blog is one of the only SL blogs I actually read too.:D And I love your pictures! You definitely have your own style and I recognize it immediately.:p
As for the whole Rumour thing. Yes good critique is good. But I've rarely seen good criticism in SL sadly. I expect critique to involve something about prim fitting, textures, seams etc. Saying just "meh, it's not my style" is not criticism, it's just pointless. I'd rather you don't say anything then.
Hey thank you, Moniq, Chestnut and Nuuna! (Chestnut - LOL, I'm glad I'm not the only one who occasionally wears an outfit for weeks at a time.) I hope this post didn't have too much of a "woe is me -please tell me you like me!" tone. I've managed to develop a thicker skin than I had when I first started here. I just wanted to make the point that creators aren't the only ones who occasionally get subjected to harsh opinions.
Regarding The Rumor, I will say that I learned a lot about templates over there this week on the Grenade-Free Wednesday post. I have friends who refuse to wear or blog template-based clothes, and frankly I'm not savvy enough to tell what's a template and what's not. And I never really got that point of view until this week: I was a little shocked to discover that I recently paid a decent amount of lindens on an item of clothing that was essentially just a template that someone bought on Marketplace and flipped for a higher price - without even altering it. I felt a little played. I wouldn't have realized it if it weren't for the (once again, heated, LOL) discussion over on that post. So they have this kind of rogue consumer advocacy vibe that I can appreciate.
Regarding their comments, I don't always agree with what they say or how they say it. But I'll admit, my inner juvenile gets delighted with some of the choice sayings like, "plywood all up in this bitch!" So I guess I'll join Ali on the "sometimes I feel snarky" ban lists. I don't want anyone to cry though.
If someone started a similar blog that featured little screencaps and quips (QUIPS!) about other blog posts each week, mine would probably be on the damn thing all the time. I'd like to think I would just descend to the same level and respond with "so does your mama" and get over it, but who knows, maybe I'd end up curled up in a ball somewhere wailing.
Emerald,
If I can add my 2 cents to this as a former Mean Girl...
I actually like that your blog takes a more honest and funny approach to created content of all types. Not many folks will blog houses and furniture or even breedables.
I appreciate that you've bought some of my stuff. I even got all fangirly like with "ZOMG! EMERALD WYNN WAS AT MY STORE!" once and people thought I was high. LOL
I think creators should feel honored if you like their stuff or even mention their stuff even if it's kinda 'out there'. Even bad press is good press in some cases.
Just remember that many people do appreciate what you do, so please don't change. :-)
Oh my GAHHHHH — your Neverending Story necklace is one of the most AWESOME things I own!!! I had, like, a NeverEnding Storygasm when I saw it.
Now if I could just talk somebody into making a giant Falcor, I would replace my mouse sleigh with it in the sky over my house!
Thank you! ♥
Great post, I agree!
I admit I go to The Rumor sometimes too (hi-5 Alicia)! if I want to see what's out and nobody else knows. Because, you see... I am lazy, don't wish to leave my box unless I actually want something :D.
I'm a lazy blogger, i'll admit it, I don't get invited to everything despite being a blogger for nigh on 95% of my almost 8 years here.. and why? Because I slack, so therefore, I do not expect to be taken as seriously as bloggers that do not slack.
I won't be a bitch just to be a bitch, and I will sometimes say "this isn't so much me, but... I tried it anyway!". I will be overly polite, most likely, but well, not many people read my blog anyway! :D
Despite what some people think, I am not that well connected, I amble about, I do things at my own speed, I spend stupid amounts of Lindens and I throw tables out of the window at least once a month because I feel like a shitty blogger, but I know that is all my own doing. I don't put myself out there, I don't try as hard as I could.. because I have a job and I have kids and I have cats (rl.. but I mean SL ones :P).
I agree with what's said above mostly, but well, I rarely comment even though I read.. so. Here I am! :)
I have to say despite what some mean folks will say I really enjoy your blog. Whenever you post I know it's going to leave me chuckling and sometimes that's all a girl can ask for.
It's a bad designer who doesn't appreciate the bloggers who are earnestly trying to show their items. We might not be the best or the most well known but we matter just the same. (ps. I'm kind of relieved to see I'm not the *only* blogger not blogging the Vintage Fair) Of course if you happen to be as little known as I am you'd kill even to get a bad response. Sometimes the complete ignoring is just as much of an 'ouch' moment. I also believe an honest post makes a good blogger.
End rambling. Anyways Just wanted to say I heart you and your blog <3 Thanks for being awesome sauce
Hi Emerald, I like your blog too, and as a blogger, I'm terrified to ask designers for review copies. In fact I don't remember I time that I have, because it is . SCARY .
But I thought I would reply, selfishly, just to explain that the bloggers list for Vintage Fair was assigned to Prue Genira, one of the junior event assistants for this event because it was a big event and I thought she'd be okay to handle it. We had open applications which we announced on our blog and in our subscribomatics. I got a lot of IMs this week from people who reguarly blog our events, including Grazia, who hadn't noticed the apps so had missed out and I just added them in over Prue's head (arent I naughty? xD)
If you ever get missed just IM me, even if, like today, I have an automessage saying 'Do you really need to IM me right now?!', do it. Cos it is the kind of thing that *is* important. I tried keeping lists of the bloggers we reguarly use but it changes so much, things get lost and forgotten.
Hope you forgive me!
Btw, kick ass sleigh. Before I read the text I checked to see if it was pigs flying. XD
- Keira Seerose
From my times as a blogger, a content creator and a L****n I found the verbal thunderdome of SL fashion a waste of energy that could be spent creating beauty.
This blog is beautiful. An earlier comment said it better than I can: "I think some of the biggest "edgy" moves a person can make is to be really vulnerable, and to take the consequences of that vulnerability without becoming harsh and cold."
Thanks for reading The Rumor. We appreciate that you appreciate us. I wasn't accepted to Vintage Fair bloggers either but I know my blog needs work so I didn't take it too much to heart as should the designers we critique.
For the reader who said they don't like when we say something isn't our style, I just do that because it's an okay item in my opinion but seriously not my style. I'm not intentionally trying to be snarky or bitchy, just honest.
Hey Emerald~ I wouldn't call myself a blogger or fashionista or anyone really important like so many of these other great people commenting here, though I do enjoy blogging and love fashion. Just want to say hey, Love your blog, have read it for YEARS and you ALWAYS bring a smile to my face. Thanks for that! Keep on being you, cause... you Rock!
Wooo! And slowly, Emerald's army forms... and gradually... we will take over the grid and cover it with KittyCats and prim sleighs drawn by mice!!!
I, for one, welcome our new Shiny Translucent Green Stone Overlord.
(I'm not blogging the VIntagething either, but I'm, like, swampedish and kind of flaky...)
Thank you Willis, Khloe, Keira, Steven and Boudica! I appreciate your kind words. Yeeks, I swear I didn't write this post with a "please tell me you like me" and "wah wah wah I don't get to blog stuff" agenda. I had to share some of the feedback about my blog to illustrate the point that sometimes bloggers get bitch-slapped too.
- Willis, you sound like my kind of friend. That comment sounds identical to my life, throwing tables and all. And shut up - your blog is MUCH LOVED BY MANY!
- Khloe, I saw you at an event the other day and said "Khlo. . . " and then crashed. I really liked your "I will leave my mark so everyone will know" post - I feel the same way. And like you, I also noticed the Vintage Fair application at the last minute and missed the deadline and was too skeeeered to bug Keira about it and speaking of . . .
- Keira, you are awesome and I realize you have hundreds of bloggers applying - it's gotta be impossible to keep track of them. I appreciate that when you host events, you make the blogger applications available. I'm the dork who repeatedly blows those deadlines or just completely spaces the application process altogether. Oops. Like I said in the post, Chic Management is lovely to work with. Congrats on the success of Vintage Fair! WOOOO! I will invite you to the funeral I'll be holding for my lindens in a few days.
First and most importantly "Now I am older, wiser, and a much more seasoned mood-altering-pill popper." should be your new slogan.
I just want to say I appreciate your voice, your blog is one of the few I actually frequent because I know you are going to be honest.
I thought about going on a big soapbox, defending the blog and my girls… but I'd rather just say you are welcome to any of my sim/store/blog events and will be the first on my list, if I ever actually make a list? BECAUSE of your voice.
I have said it before and will continue to say it, we all have different religions, ethnicities, beliefs, morals etc… but the one thing that is consistent that we all need to value in one another despite our differences is each others voices. It may be different, but none the less, it doesn't make it less important than any other. Your voice is beautiful and respectable and obviously well valued. And, I for one appreciate it.
I think it's sad and pathetic when people decide particular voices aren't up to par and prove to shut them down. It's the awkward, crazy voices who have the guts to stand up that bring that umph and spark to life.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=y_VmZ9GvKdc&feature=related
Finally, I'm seconding the Falcor sleigh. That would make my sl complete.
PS I am putting together a post, hopefully adding some clarity to the great template debate of 2011, it should be done in the next couple days...
Hey KiSMeT! You know, in a format like yours where you've got all these items and you want to give people a quick rundown of them, I've always thought that "it's not my style" is a diplomatic way to express that situation. It can also mean "it's not my style so I can't give you a valid opinion."
If I decked myself out in a bunch of stuff that's not my style and took a big picture of it and ran it here and said, "Hey everybody! Look at all this crap that's so not my style" that would take it down to Bitch Boulevard.
@Boudica - NO, BOUDICA! YOU rock! (LOL) I love your blog and I think your pictures are lovely. Hell yes, girl! Call yourself a blogger AND a fashionista. Hell, this is Second Life, so call yourself a unicorn too if it makes you happy. But YOU GO GIRL! ♥
Pennelope - EXACTLY! I live down here in Memphis, TN., and we'd say, "PREACH!" as the response to your comment (which is a good thing). I don't want to get all Kumbayah in here, but it really IS the different voices that make this place so damn interesting and special.
I have to stop trying to communicate when I'm on Ambien.
Deoridhe, you make me LOL and Stephen, you make me get kind of teary. That was really nice of you.
Once you get over the "ouch" of having something snarky or negative said about your stuff, it's actually kinda fun. I admit I somtimes AIM on getting a "WFT is this!?" review, especially from The Rumor. (I'm a little dissapointed that I didn't get more of a WTF on the peacock bolero) And if I get a "meh" it's usually because the stuff IS "meh". (gods, since I started a full time RL job, there's been a LOT of "meh" leaving my hands)
I know who my customers are, and they're definitly not most of the bloggers. (except for you, Emerald. All my stuff is made with you in mind, you crazy bitch)
I guess what I'm trying to say is 1. I'm not perfect and neither is the stuff I make. So not all reviews can be positive. and 2. Everything isn't for everyone.
Yes, there has been occations when I've been really badly slammed by people, for no good reason other than their need to make themselves look good by picking on others. But those cases are actually really rare, and when it happens, I fume a while, and then get over it.
Emerald, I appreciate your honest approach, your parenthesis, even all caps! I get tired of reading blogs that just let designers smell their own fumes.
HOW DID I MISS THAT THERE WAS A PEACOCK BOLERO????
my sole, lonely male alt so needs that.
Poor Quatre. He's so abused.
I can't get the peacock bolero. 8(
Why do I see the cool things after they are gone? Why, god! Why????
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