Go ahead! Touch my Christmas monkey! Touch it!

MERRY CHRISTMAS! Here's a picture of my cleavage!

(ha ha!)

I can't log in right now. If I had a Plurk account, I'd probably be one of those people Plurking, "HEY I CAN'T LOG IN!"

But anyway . . .

Moxie Polano has created a gown that actually made me break out my skirt shape, and believe you me, that's a difficult task. I hate system skirts. I'd rather be flouncing -- YES, "flouncing" -- around in a floaty dress or wearing jeans.

But this Partridge in a Pear Tree gown (I think that's what it's called, but I can't check because I can't log in) is part of her 12 Days of Christmas Collection. And if you're a girl, you should go check that stuff out. I like it because it's not Christmas-centric. Many of the pieces can be worn after the holidays. AND UPDATE: All day on Dec. 24, everything in the collection is half off.


(Pose courtesy of just standing around.)

I don't know how the real fashion bloggers do it. If I want to get my whole body in the frame, the picture turns out SO SMALL and SKEENY like that!

I'm wearing hot pink kicks under that gown. But in my day we called them "tennis shoes." And actually I'm really wearing the black stilettos that are included with the gown. (I think it's 750L.)

Scroll back up there for another gander -- YES, "gander" -- at my cleavage, and while you're there, look at the exquisite detailing in the neckline and the headpiece.

That's a partridge! In a pear tree! (Even the partridge is checking out my rack!)

I love Moxie Polano not just because she's talented, but also because she was the first designer to ever speak to me. It was during a hunt and we were both hopelessly lost. She taught me that not all SL designers are scary. And even though we haven't spoken since, she STILL hasn't booted me off her friends list!

That makes me feel special.

Speaking of special, I got a couple of SL gifts from friends today that literally made me get teary. They made me wish that I could make something, instead of wandering around looking for nifty items with trans perms. ("Trans perms" -- oh, the secret language we speak here!)

But I can't. And to be honest, I am STRESSED THE HELL OUT RIGHT NOW with Christmas in BOTH lives. I haven't wrapped any gifts anywhere. I haven't finished RL Christmas shopping. I need to clean my part of my real house. I need to find something cute to wear to RL Christmas Eve Mass just in case the guy I've had a crush on since fourth grade happens to be there. (I hear he's still single. Yes Virginia, there IS a Santa Claus!)

But my God, trying to accomplish all that stuff feels impossible, kind of like getting on the LeLook sim this week!

[Dear Santa, all I want for Christmas is a segue RIGHT HERE.]

I love my SL friends. The only "homemade" gift I can give them is to write about how awesome they are in my goofy blog. I try to do that whenever I can. And in the meantime, I have to stop agonizing over SL gifts now and worry about my real ones. I have to stop my relentless gridwide quest to find the perfect SL gift for each beloved friend and make peace with one perfect universal choice instead.

So as a token of my affection this year, some of you will get . . .



CHRISTMAS MONKEY!

HEY, I've looked at dozens of monkeys today and this one is QUALITY. So if you get one, LOVE IT! And yeah, maybe it's a little creepy, but monkeys are supposed to be creepy. And if you don't get one, please don't take it personally. It's just because I ran out of lindens.

And um, cough, you might get it after Christmas too. The clock is ticking! I can only wrap so many pixelated boxes in one sitting! (actually in one slouching)

Speaking of scary . . .



I never know what delicious blingy horrors I'll find in my yard when I log in sometimes.

*screams and runs*

Actually, since this post is already long (shocker), can I close it with a quote from Santa in the 1994 remake of "Miracle on 34th Street"? Thanks!

"I'm not just a whimsical figure in a charming suit who affects a jolly demeanor. I'm a symbol. I'm a symbol of the human ability to suppress the selfish and hateful tendencies that rule the major part of our lives.

"And if you can't believe, if you can't accept anything on faith, then you're doomed to a life dominated by doubt."

I BELIEVE, SANTA! ♥
So does my army of Christmas monkeys!