Monday, June 15, 2009

Day 2: Bow down before the (perfect) Queen of Zindra!


Sheeeeeeeeeeesh, I'm kind of brain dead today.

I'm gonna have to fall back on one of the suggested Big Bad Blogger Challenge topics of the day for this post:

Describe what your perfect Second Life day would be like.

Why I'd love to! Thanks for asking!

On my perfect Second Life day:

1. No modding necessary. On anything!

(But as to that picture up there, those Lynda chandelier earrings from OPIUM Everyday are awesome. "THANK YOU, DSN dropbox [and, in this case, Alaska Metropolitan]!" Every night is like Christmas now because of the new Designer Showcase Network. If you kids haven't yet swung by a DSN kiosk to subscribe for free daily samples of everything from skins to fashion to furniture to gadgets, hop over to the one located HERE and start clicking categories. And if I'm not making sense, blame my cheap red wine and go read all about DSN HERE.)

2. Jack Linden would crown me Queen of Zindra and everyone would throw a huge parade.

3. Stiletto Moody would finally adopt the brand slogan I wrote for her: "It ain't ghetto if you're wearin' Stiletto!"

4. But seriously, Stiletto Moody would lock down her update group and send all of us loyalists a SHOCKINGLY FABULOUS group gift (as in shoes) from her upcoming new BARE© foot line. (Dood, she totally copyrighted the word bare!)

. . . Hey, that reminds me, if you look closely you'll see that I revealed some very sensitive and personal information about myself in that photo up there: I'M BROKE! So along those lines:

5. Linden Labs would give us a RAISE and up the weekly premium-account allowance from 300L to 500L. Actually, since we're fantasizing, make that 1,000L.

6. All of you would catch my BLOGGING IN BOLD ALL-CAPS FEVER!

Is this post starting to sound really shallow? IT IS! It's all about clothes, shopping, money and gimme gimme gimme and me me me me me me ME!


I should write something about a perfect friendship or a perfect romance or gridwide peace or uniting to make a gigantic impact on a really noble cause or . . .

7. Jewelry designer Random Calliope would QUITE RANDOMLY drop a BOX OF AWESOME on me that includes his forever-elusive (to me) Water and Sky set and that (tries not to curse and throw the butterfly net) "darn" ring in Twilight.

DOH! *hums Madonna's "Material Girl"*

If you're new, you might not understand No. 7. Go to Wanderstill (you'll land in a house when you get there -- don't worry, you're allowed to be in there), turn on your music stream, breathe deeply, wander out into the fields, check out the beautiful scenery, mellow out, then click any butterflies you see and they might just drop some gorgeous jewelry on you. Join the Ode Butterfly Hunters group for alerts on organized hunts. And if you need info beyond those two sentences, IM me inworld. I love to convert people to Seekers of Ode. Or just tell me your favorite color and hit me up for a set -- now I collect them JUST to spread the love and give them away.

8. I would suddenly have the magic power to pick one thing in my inventory and manifest it in real life, in which case I would pick my SL cat Dewey, bought and named in memory of my real cat Dewey, who passed away a little over a year ago at the ripe old age of 15. I still miss her terribly. She liked to lay down next to me and lick my forehead. She was the best cat ever.

And GAH, now I'm crying. No tears! I have to get my Tennessee driver's license picture taken tomorrow. I don't want those puffy cry-eyes!

That's why I stick to the shallow stuff. Sorry.

9. Speaking of my premium account, on my perfect day, Linden Labs would WAKE UP AND SMELL MY VISA CARD and get the bright idea to give me more for my money . . . like 10 more group slots.

Actually, five more is all I need, Linden Labs! Just five! Then I could rejoin the Inksters group and participate in intellectual and oft-hilarious group chats about writing and books, instead of using that group slot for, um (scans list of groups) apparently a fashion-oriented group that gives rawkin' group gifts. *runs from the haters*

Because of my greed, I have run out of group slots. I don't even have a sacrificial slot anymore. And gosh, that sentence sounded filthy enough to make me laugh.

Wow, we just went from crying to laughing in the space of a mere number. I swear I'm not crazy. I'm just ovulating.

10. Frankly, my perfect day in Second Life would be a day where I could just BE in Second Life without someone in my real-life house constantly asking, "What're you doing?" "Are you on that computer?" "What are you doing on that computer?" "You're not playing that GAME are you?" "Let me see your screen." "It's a beautiful day. Turn that thing off and go out and get some FRESH AIR."

Sheeeeeeeesh! The way I have to sneak around now, you'd think I was addicted to online porn or something.

And now unfortunately whenever someone Googles "addicted to online porn," this post is going to pop up and confuse the hell out of them.


*yells "PORN!" one last time and runs off into a perfect sunset with the little pixelated Dewey-cat*


Learning Teacher said...

Woman! 687L$ is broke?! I have walked around the grid with 10L$ at times! :P


Ari K said...

My mother is over 80. She visits for two-week periods, and of course peers over my shoulder, meaning she's also seen me building in SL (note: she has not seen me doing - um - other things. I'm not stupid).

If I had 10L for every time I hear 'your generation (hah - as in sweet young well-over-forties) can only have fun if it's something with a plug on the end', or 'I do think you should get out more', or 'are you on that thing (the PC on which I make a living, also), I'd be off for some more SL jewellery - like rather a lot of it.

My daughter has it made - she's 21 and has an extremely busy online (and RL) life and I'm OK with that... although I caught myself saying 'if you spent less time online, your apartment wouldn't be such a pigsty' last week. Mothers remain mothers.

Tymmerie Thorne said...

You are the Queen of Zindra in my world - I only ask that you make me a Princess or Lady or something.

And a hearty "SING IT, SISTER!" about making premium accounts more premium!

Anonymous said...

I tried to show my 30 year old niece - yes I have 30 year old niece, who is almost 31 actually and a 34 year nephew and a grand niece who is 2 woot, woot. Sorry I digress, as I was saying I tried to show my 30 year old niece second life over christmas. What was her response? "I don't get it". But keep in mind, this same 30 year old niece wanted to spend christmas day touring the Branch Davidian compound in Waco TX. Yes, even my family members are warped. LOL.

Owly Indigo said...

I'm gonna make "We swear we're not crazy. We're just ovulating." one of the Hallelujah sim mottoes.

Anonymous said...

hahaha I love the circled L amount. I feel your pain sista. :p

Anonymous said...

Once again you have made me LOL. Yes, more group slots-Please! I'm a member of Inksters-you should rejoin.

Did you ever receive the L1,000 grant? It magically appeared in my account one day and that kind of felt like Christmas or more like a L1,000 grant from Linden!


Fricker said...

All hail the Queen of Zindra!!! Bow down to her most EXCELLENT post. I loved this! Fricker

Prad Prathivi said...

Your perfect day in SL doesn't include me?!


Emerald Wynn said...

LOL PRAD! Actually I was totally going to include you, but I didn't want you to say, "I wish that chick would stop blog-stalking me!" But Version 1 totally had a Prad moment, I swear.

*runs like hell from Prad's partner*

-- waves up at my lovely friends and shouts, "Welcome, Ari K! Thanks for dropping in. I'm coming to your awesome store soon." --

Ari K said...

Oh I've been lurking for months, actually but spared you from my rambles and UK spelling so far.

Wonderful blog, and said by one who also attempts to make an RL living with words. Sadly, however, my stuff mostly involves boring, academic worse-than-watching-paint-dry texts that have to be written, translated or beaten into shape.

So no wonder a few fish tanks, all-bold capitals and rawks help things along.

DON'T come to the store (yet). I'm about to get out the huge hammer and move to pastures new and pretty and Provençal (no, Lourdes not included, sorry, that's to the left a bit). I will no doubt pester you to visit when I've finished screwing up on the terraforming (oooooo look big hole in the sand) and shooting megaprims 4000 metres into the sky. Must reember to type alignment coordinates in the right box.

It would help if I didn't get distracted by the shopping, too. How sad is it that hidden in a corner of my pending files (rubbing shoulders with Serious Things) is one called 'clothes', with things I've seen on the blogs when I can't log in?

(and you think YOU make long posts... I actually left Live Journal many moons agi, pre-SL, because I was boring *myself* with my views on life and the universe. Now I just try not to waffle too much about LOOK AT THE DAMNED TEXTURING on my crappy photos of fireplaces).

And now I want to go be rambly on my own blog. And I should be either translating about counterfeiting (useful to pay the bills) or building more bits of Provence (way more fun).

Emerald Wynn said...

Ari, that comment made me laugh out loud. Seriously.

Thank you for your kind words and the laughs.

I look forward to seeing your new place. :D

Ari K said...

I thank YOU, because your blog has been a highlight of many days of dreary legalese or economics (where do they GET these words like 'managerialisation'?)

It's also leading me into Thames Station (took me years to figure out that wasn't the right version) to blog again.

Not sure if this is a good thing but it's fun.